No Good Guys With Guns at Pence Speech, NRA Says

Pence

LaPierre

The National Rifle Association says it’s prohibiting good guys with guns at the speech Vice President Mike Pence will be giving later this week at the NRA’s convention in Dallas.

“Good guys with guns will be asked to leave their guns outside the room where the vice president is speaking,” NAR President and Chairman Wayne LaPierre said today. “We have arranged to have their arms safely and securely stored on their behalf.”

LaPierre said the decision does not change the necessity of having good guys with guns at public schools throughout the United States. “To prevent bad guys with guns harming children while they’re at school, it’s imperative that good buys with guns be present at the schools,” he said.

The NRA conference is expected to have thousands of good guys with guns in attendance. “Any bad guys with guns who wants to disrupt America’s gun meeting will have to contend with good buys with guns who know how to use them and won’t hesitate to use them safely and effectively if needed,” LaPierre said.

LaPierre said the decision to prohibit good guys with guns from keeping their guns with them while the vice president is speaking is simply a safety measure. “Someone could get shot,” he said.

This is a work of satire. It is a fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos: pd and cc. Creative Commons and public domain. Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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