LOS ANGELES—Ruffies Pictures, Inc., announced today that former Trump campaign aide Sam Nunberg will join Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, and Zach Galifianakis for the fourth installment of the popular movie series The Hangover.
“Adding one-time Republican operative Sam Nunberg to The Hangover series will help us capitalize on the intense interest in politics we’re seeing right now thanks to President Trump and his administration,” says Phil Todds, president of Ruffies Pictures.
The Hangover IV will follow Nunberg, playing himself, as he goes on a one-day tear of self-destruction by saying on national TV that he won’t respond to a Grand Jury subpoena as part of the special counsel investigation into Russia collusion by the Trump campaign. He instead invites Special Counsel Robert Mueller to arrest him by saying, among other things, “If Mueller wants to send me to jail, he can send me to jail. And then I’ll laugh.” He also says President Donald Trump probably did do something with the Russians during the campaign and that Trump knew about the infamous Trump Tower meeting between the Russians and his campaign team even though he’s always denied it.
The plot will revolve around Nunberg waking up the next day and only then realizing what he had said, which makes him think he must have been under the influence of a date-rape drug such as Zolpidem, Benzodiazepine, Rohypnol, or Gamma-hydroxybutyrate.
“You can imagine the hilarity that ensues as Nunberg retraces his steps and learns of all the damaging things he said to the Washington Post, Associated Press, New York magazine, Vox, Bloomberg News, Yahoo News, MSNBC, and CNN,” Todds says.
Nunberg worked for the Trump campaign in 2015 but left after being accused of putting questionable posts on Facebook, which Nunberg says he probably did while under the influence of a date-rape drug.
This is a work of satire. It is a fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Image: Modified screen shot of YouTube research results. Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.
The dramatic 30 percent tariff the White House plans to impose on imported Steele isn’t a misspelling of the word steel, White House Spokesperson Sarah Huckabee Sanders said today at her daily briefing. “We think Steele is harmful to the United States and we are absolutely trying to discourage it from coming into the country by imposing what we think is a completely justified tariff on it,” she said. “Allowing Steele into the United States, with no restraint, paying no price, is a fast-track way to trouble,” Sanders added. “That’s President Trump’s view. He wants to curb it. And he has the authority to do that.” More.
House and Senate leaders, concerned recent moves by Donald Trump could cause lasting damage to the United States, say it might be necessary to remove the President from office before he’s given due process because going through impeachment and then a vote to remove him would take too long. “We like taking his office first and going through due process second,” Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) told reporters after meeting with a bi-partisan group of leaders from the House and Senate. “Think of a crazy person holding a gun. You want to take the gun first and give him due process later.” McConnell said lawmakers don’t have a lot of time because the President is about to launch a trade war, which is expected to lead to retaliatory measures from many countries, including many allied countries, and the midterm elections are coming up and the President has yet to order action against efforts Russia has already taken to destabilize the process. More.
White House Communications Director Hope Hicks, after testifying in a closed-door hearing of the House Intelligence Committee, said she’s launching a movement called #WhiteLiesMatter to protect President Trump’s ability to lie on behalf of the American people. “No one should be telling this President and this White House what they can and cannot say to forward the agenda of the American people,” she said. Hicks accused Democratic members of the House Intelligence Committee of repeatedly challenging her about what’s true and what’s not after she admitted she tells white lies on behalf of the President. “Democrats want to tell the President and his White House what to say,” she said in a tweet last night. “We must not let them. #WhiteLiesMatter.” More.
President Donald Trump took aim at law enforcement officers who waited outside while a former student shot up his school in Florida two weeks ago by saying he would have tried to save the kids even if he were unarmed and bone spurs on his feet were hurting him. “You don’t know until you test it,” Trump told a gathering of governors at the Whte House yesterday. “But I think I would have gone in. I love the kids, so I would have tried to ignore the pain on my heels. I’ve been told I’m a tough cookie. People have made that observation about me. It’s a tough call, but I think I would have gone in, although I probably would have had a bad limp.” Trump has proposed arming a portion of the country’s teachers and training them in the use of firearms as a way to deter school shootings, which are on the rise. The last major shooting, at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Fla., left 17 students and two teachers dead after Nikolas Cruz, 19, used a legally purchased assault rifle in a shooting spree. More.
President Trump, long considered a master at keeping track of his lies, is starting to get his lies confused with one another and making mistakes that are uncharacteristic of him, aides say. “I don’t know if it’s the pressure of the job or his age or some combination of the two, but the President is not the guy who could make up stories on the fly anymore,” one aide said on the condition of anonymity so the person could speak freely about the President’s mental state. The aide cited the current messaging challenge posed by former White House secretary Ron Porter, who resigned two weeks ago after allegations arose that he abused his two ex-wives and also an ex girlfriend. More.
Top White House policy aide Stephen Miller has been accused of abusing himself by yelling at his face in the mirror when he shaves, making disparaging remarks about his empty social life when he eats dinner alone, and wishing he were anyone other than the most disliked person in Washington when he wakes up in the morning. The accusation, which was first reported by The Guardian of London, is based on an extensive interview with Miller by the publication and corroborated by Miller’s neighbor, who says she hears “abusive, expletive-filled language” every night between Miller and his bathroom mirror. More.