Trump: ‘Last Thing We Need Are 800,000 Dreamers Becoming Democratic Voters’

Too bad for you!

President Donald Trump moved to cut off 800,000 potential Democratic voters from the rolls by ending the amnesty program for immigrants who came to the United States as children known as DACA, the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals program.

“When you have almost one million people, many of whom are now of voting age and would likely vote Democratic should they ever become full-fledged citizens, you have to take drastic action to protect your democracy,” Trump said yesterday in announcing his plan to end DACA in six months unless Congress acts to reform it.

DACA recipents, known as Dreamers, can’t vote, but they would be eligible to vote should they eventually become U.S. citizens.

The action was met by sharp criticism from Democratic leaders in Congress, which Trump said he expected. “If you rely on brown people to keep you in office, you’re going to be unhappy,” Trump said.

Trump also took a shot at Republican congressional leaders, who also criticized his decision. “Loser Republicans are never going to win the votes of these people,” He said. “Get smart, Republicans! I’m showing you how to win!”

The six-month timeframe will end just before the 2018 midterm elections. “That’s 800,000 potential votes the Democrats will never see,” Trump said. “You’re welcome.”

This is a work of satire. It is a fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos: cc. Creative Commons and public domain. Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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We’re All Rapists and Criminals, Mexican Agrees

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A Mexican who crossed into the United States 18 months ago and is working here illegally said it’s true that people from his country are mostly rapists and criminals. “I don’t know how Mr. Trump knew it, but he totally knows what we’re all about,” says the man, who asked not to be identified so he could speak freely to the media.The Mexican immigrant says he and millions of others like him are losers who are too lazy and stupid to make their own country work, so they come here to leach off the success of the United States. “Everything we touch reeks of refried beans and chiles,” he says. “Our hair is oily and we treat our women like dirt. We drive broken-down trucks and we take jobs from good Americans who could really use the work. I can’t say I disagree with Mr Trump when he says we should all be deported and a big wall erected to keep filth like us out.” More.

3 Weeks Into Trump Presidency, White Supremacists Dismayed That Jews, Blacks Still Allowed to be American

letterLeaders of the National Aryan Front, American Freedom Party, Ku Klux Klan, and other white supremacist oganzations in the United States issued a joint letter to President Donald Trump today expressing concern over the slow pace of the “solution” they expect him to enact for people of inferior races and ethnicities. “While we appreciate the many priorities any new administration must contend with, the lack of meaningful progress on the white nationalist agenda is troubling,” the leaders say in the letter, which was hand-delivered to the White House this morning. The letter reminds Trump that his election depended in large part on the unwavering support from the white supremacist community, particularly when he was being criticized in the media during the primaries. “When other groups were challenging you for your accurate and appropriate concerns over the biased rulings of so-called Judge Gonzalo Curiel against Trump University, we were your most vocal and consistent supporters,” the letter says. More. 

Higher Wall, Tougher Immigration Would Have Kept Harvey Out, Trump Says

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British Americans, Citing ‘Heritage,’ Rally to Erect King George Statute

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Trump: You Bring America Together When You Vote Republican

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Trump Combover Implicated in Panama Papers Exposé

And you can too

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Parliament Votes to Allow Trump’s Combover Into Britain, But Not Trump

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Despite His Criminality and Sexual Assault Bragging, He’s Not a Mexican Criminal or Rapist, Trump Says

'I'm really rich.'*

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