Higher Wall, Stronger Immigration Laws Would Have Kept Harvey Out, Trump Says

Unwanted visitor

President Donald Trump in a series of early-morning tweets blamed lax immigration laws for opening the door to Hurricane Harvey, possibly the most destructive natural disaster to hit the United States in a generation. “A country that can’t secure its borders invites menaces like Harvey,” the president said in his first tweet, sent at 4:59 a.m., Monday. “We need walls, high walls, not just on Mexican border but around ALL country’s vulnerable borders.”

Trump also took a stab at Texas Sen. Ted Cruz, one of his rivals for the Republican presidential nomination last year, saying Cruz’s Cuban background means he “cares more about protecting Castro’s island than his own state. #KennedyAssassination!”

Experts appeared on news shows to dispute the president’s assertions. “Walls don’t keep out hurricanes and neither do immigration laws, no matter how strong,” Peter Austin, an immigration law specialist at Harvard University, said on ABC News. “Even if Harvey had met every legal requirement, he still would have dumped several feet of rainwater on the fourth largest city in the United States. Only bigger reservoirs and stronger dams would have helped.”

Nancy Peterson, an immigration rights advocate at the non-partisan Immigration Law Project in Washington, said on NBC that immigrants will be the ones who do most of the clean-up in Houston and elsewhere when the waters recede. “Who do you think is going to replace the rotting drywall in the basements of a hundred thousand houses next month?” she said. “It won’t be the white nationalists waving their KKK and neo-Nazi flags at a confederate statute in Georgia; it’ll be our hard-working immigrants from Mexico and Central America who do it. A country of immigrants must stop demonizing its immigrants.”

Trump said a 15-foot wall “with solar power on top!” would have kept out Harvey and also provided clean electricity to Texas. “Congress must ACT. Mexico will pay for the wall but we need budget UPFRONT to get going. Ryan, McConnell need to get BACK TO WORK!”

Trump travels to Texas this week. Julian Castro, former mayor of San Antonio and secretary of housing and urban development under President Barack Obama, said he would support funding for a border wall if it kept Trump’s helicopter from flying over Houston. “And the White House should pay for it,” he said.

Castro said he would make an exception for Trump’s combover if it wanted to come, but it would have to leave the president behind.

This is a work of satire. It is a fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos: pd. Creative Commons and public domain. Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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