Melania: ‘If We Lived in a Trailer, I’d Love Donald Even More’

Melania Trump

First Lady Melania Trump, who married Donald Trump 12 years ago after a career as an international fashion model, says she could easily dispense with her family’s luxurious lifestyle and be content settling down with her husband to live a simple life.

“What people don’t understand is that Donald and I have a connection that runs very deep,” she told Elle magazine in an interview. “I’m not saying I don’t enjoy being the First Lady of the United States and living in the White House, or, prior to that, having our own fleet of private airplanes and also traveling around New York City in our helicopter. Of course I do. But I would give all that up tomorrow if Donald lost everything and we had to live on, say, a $40,000 salary he earned as a tire salesman.”

The First Lady said she grew up in humble circumstances in Slovenia (the former Yugoslavia) and fully expected to live that kind of lifestyle when she met Trump at a Fashion Week party in 1998. “Did I know he was rich? Of course,” she said. “But for me, that wasn’t part of the attraction. Had he said he was donating his wealth to charity to live in a trailer in Oklahoma, I would have said yes to marrying him all the same. In fact, to me the wealth is a burden. I have hundreds of outfits that cost tens of thousands of dollars each. They must get cleaned. They must stay pressed. They must be organized so I can find the right outfit for the right occasion. I miss the simplicity of my childhood.”

Trump, whose maiden name is Knavs, said she sometimes longs for the chance to fly commercially like most Americans. “It’s like a rite of passage to buy your ticket and stand in line to be screened,” she said. “Take your shoes off, remove your belt, then find a spot after you have been screened to put your accessories back on. I miss that part of America.”

Natasha Cilic, Trump’s long-time personal assistant, says the First Lady often wishes she could dispense with the trappings of wealth and just live a simple life—just she and her husband and their 10-year old son, Barron William, whom the First Lady wanted to name Ed. “Sometimes she’ll ask me to bring her just a pair of jeans and a matching top to wear,” Cilic says.

‘Fix the faucet yet, Don?’

Trump says she sometimes spends “an insane amount of money” on something frivolous in the hopes it will help them run out of money. “I think to myself, if I spend $220,000 on clothes today, that will bring us $220,000 closer to just being ordinary people,” she said. “Really, I just see Donald and me puttering around the house, eating grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup for lunch, then working in the yard, mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, he in shorts and me in capri pants. I’ll say, ‘Donald, the faucet in the kitchen has a drip,’ and he’ll say, ‘It probably just needs a new washer. I’ll run down to Home Depot and get one. They’re only, like, 30 cents.'”

“I’ve told Donald so many times,” Trump continued, “I’d like to just donate the money to the needy and live our lives out of the spotlight. Don’t be surprised if we do just that after his presidency. I think he wants that, too. He’s really a very humble person inside who prefers not to draw attention to himself. That is the Donald I love and appreciate. That is the Donald that I married.”

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos (some modified) tnn (Creative Commons and public domain). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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