Saddam Hussein: ‘Hah! I Had a 111% Approval Rating!’

pd

111% approval!

Former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein came back from the dead today to throw some shade at Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump for praising the 82 percent approval rating of Russian President Vladimir Putin.

“Eighty-two percent! I snort at that!” said Hussein, who was executed by the Federal Government of Iraq in 2006, when he was 69. “My Revolutionary Command Council would have had a good laugh if I had run my country as a strongman with only an 82 percent approval, I can tell you that, my friend!”

Hussein said a strong leader should never have anything under 100 percent approval, and he pointed to his impressive 111 percent approval rating when he asked his people in a poll what they thought of his job performance in 2003, shortly before an international coalition of forces invaded his country and forced him into hiding.

“I am not a sentimental person, but I shed a tear at the love of my people on that day,” said Hussein, who added that he thinks even the 250,000 Iraqis he had murdered over the years voted their approval in the poll for him to get such a high number.

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Putin is strong; U.S. is weak

Trump’s praise of Putin’s 82 percent approval rating came while he was being interviewed on his military and foreign policy views by Matt Lauer for an NBC news special on September 7. The comment provoked condemnation by his Democratic opponent, Hillary Clinton, and others, since Putin is an authoritarian leader who doesn’t face the same constraints as an American president. Hussein, who was was brought to trial for crimes against humanity in 2006 after American troops found him hiding in a hole in ad-Dawr, echoed the criticism.

“Putin is not a strongman,” Saddam said. “If you want to see a strongman, look at Nikita Khrushchev, Wojciech Jaruzelski, Nicolae Ceaușescu, Erich Honecker. These are strongmen worthy of the name. Putin! Bah! He will end up in a hole and breathing out of a straw. You need an approval rating of at least 112 percent to protect you from your people. Not even 111 percent is enough!”

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos (some modified): pd, screen grab (Creative Commons). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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