Lewandowski: ‘Guess I Just Rubbed Out People the Wrong Way’

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Lewandowski: Rubs out wrong

In the wake of his sudden firing as Donald Trump’s campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski says he’s not sure why he was let go but he thinks he simply rubbed out people the wrong way.

“I’ve come to know Donald Trump well in the two years I was his right-hand man, and I can say he doesn’t like his staffers to rub out people the wrong way,” Lewandowski said yesterday.

Lewandowski said he rubbed out several people the wrong way, including a New York Times reporter, a Republican political consultant, and a voter. “The voter wasn’t going to vote for Donald Trump anyway,” Lewandowski said. “I didn’t see any reason to rub him out the right way.”

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Fields: Rubbed wrong

Analysts say Lewandowski had a well-earned reputation as a tough and protective aide to Trump. Indeed, he became a household name in March when he was charged with battery for manhandling Breitbart news reporter Michelle Fields, who tried to ask Trump a question as he was leaving a campaign rally. The charges were dropped.

Lewandowski said the reporter looked like she was going to rub Trump the wrong way. “Donald likes to be rubbed a certain way and I felt she wasn’t going to rub him that way,” he said.

What’s his next move now that he’s out of a job? “Skills training,” he said. “I know I rub out a lot of people the wrong way. There’s a right way to do it and a wrong way to do it, and if I want to keep a job longer than two years, I’m going to have to learn how to rub out people the right way.”

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos (some modified) pd (Creative Commons and public domain). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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