Trump: People Say North Korea Is a Hoax, Moon Landing Was Faked, Reagan Was Murdered

mn

Just sayin’

SACRAMENTO, Calif.—Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump said today he believes the moon landing in 1969 was real but “many people” believe the whole thing was orchestrated by the federal government to impress the world and scare the Soviets. “I’m not saying I believe that, but many people have questions about it,” Trump said at a campaign appearance here. “There are people who know about these things who say they saw the interior of a warehouse in Los Angeles converted to look like the surface of the moon, complete with fine dust and craters and the whole thing. Lot of tinfoil lying around. Did NASA hire a Hollywood crew to distract us from Vietnam? I don’t know.”

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Donald_Trump#/media/File:Trump_and_Rodman_2009.jpg

Been to ‘North Korea’

Trump also said he thinks former president Ronald Reagan died of natural causes in 2004, when he was 93, but “there are people who think it was pretty suspicious that he suddenly got ‘pneumonia.’ I’m not saying I’m one of them, but do healthy people in a sunny place like Bel Air get pneumonia even though they have all the doctors they need a phone call away? Sure is convenient for Democrats to have the last remaining Republican icon out of the picture so they can start back-stabbing his legacy.”

Trump also said a lot of people think North Korea, the repressive communist country led by the Kim dynasty, is not a real country but is rather an elaborate hoax perpetrated by the United States Department of State with the cooperation of other countries.

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“No one knows Koreans better than me,” he said. “I’ve done business wth them. Very warm-hearted people, by the way. Good negotiators. But when you ask them about ‘North Korea,’ they don’t want to talk about that. It’s very suspicious. You talk to anyone. Has anyone you know actually been there? I know Dennis Rodman. He says he’s ‘been there,’ but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, to be perfectly honest with you, and I say that as a friend. Go to any soundstage in Los Angeles. They can make you believe anything. A country that no one’s seen. People are asking questions. I’m not saying I’m one of them. And that so-called endorsement by Kim Jong Un? Good one, Hillary.”

In other remarks, Trump said the Russians have a cure for Zika “because they’re beating the pants off our scientists,” Trump University “gave out better degrees than Harvard,” and Trump wine is “the best in the world by far—and it only costs $18 a bottle.” He also said “many people” don’t believe hurricanes are real, tornadoes are “nature’s way of clearing underused real estate,” and Eastern Europe has “the best women, the sexiest women,” and that’s “all it has going for it.” That’s a real shame, he said, because soon all the good Eastern European women will be married to Americans, Brits, and others and there won’t be anyone left in that part of the world except “sour men playing chess in the park.”

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photo: gs, mn (Creative Commons). Not necessarily an endorsed use of image.

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Trump with newly named advisor

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Facebook Hit By Fake News Story That It’s Banning Fake News Stories

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