In a sensational claim, the supermarket tabloid Weekly National Report says a 50-year-old woman in Fayetteville, Ark., Dannielle Eggles, is the daughter of presumptive Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump and she’s demanding a “White House bedroom” for her and her husband if he is elected president.
“This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but I feel I must come forward because it’s time for my daddy to stop pretending I don’t exist,” Eggles said at a press conference in Fayetteville yesterday.
Eggles, a clerk at Target, said she had resigned herself to living in the shadow of her famous father and her glamorous half brothers and sisters, but six months ago she and her husband, Ron Eggles, decided she could no longer do that. “We just thought it wasn’t fair that Ivanka, Tiffany, Eric, Donald, Jr., and Barron all get to live the high life while we have to scrape our fingers to the bone just because daddy pretends I don’t exist.”
Eggles claims Trump, when he was 19, fathered her with a woman he took to a motel in Staten Island after a party. “No one knows who the woman is,” said Eggles. I don’t even know. All I know is, Daddy had some people put me in a home to be raised and no one asked any questions, I guess because he paid them real well.”
When she turned 18, Eggles said, she left Staten Island with her boyfriend at the time and moved to Atlanta, where he worked in a motorcycle shop. After her boyfriend left her, she said, she moved to Fayetteville, where a friend lived, and met Ron Eggles.
David Knopp, Eggles attorney, said his client isn’t asking for money. “What she wants,” he said, “is respect. She wants to be acknowledged, and to have a bedroom in the White House for her and her husband. This is not a grab for money.”
Knopp added that Dannielle would also like her father to find a job for her husband in his administration, if that’s possible. “He has some experience as a diesel mechanic,” he said. “But he can do other things, too.”
Trump denies knowing Eggles. On Twitter last night, he sent a tweet that said, “News of my long-lost daughter: NOT TRUE. It’s a campaign trick by Crooked Hillary. It won’t work!”
But Knopp said he has incontrovertible proof that Trump is the father. “We have DNA evidence,” he said. “We have the contract he signed with the family to take care of Dannielle. We’ve had forensic tests run on all the documents. And we have multiple people who’ve signed affidavits attesting to what happened. This is the real thing.”
Knopp said he is preparing to take legal action if Trump doesn’t meet the terms his client is seeking. “This is a sad tale of alcohol-fueled sex,” he said. This is a desperate effort to avoid responsibility by a young man who had the means to cover up his actions. All my client is seeking is a chance to finally have closure—and to have a bedroom in the White House. It’s not too much to ask, and we know there are enough rooms at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. for her to have one with her husband.”
This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photo: mvn (Creative Commons). Not necessarily an endorsed use of image.
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