Sanders Stunned Southern Voters Didn’t Turn Out For a Brooklyn Socialist

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Holding back voter tide?

Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders, whose campaign for the Democratic presidential nomination got off to a big start with strong performances in Iowa and New Hampshire, says he can’t understand why voters in a southern state like South Carolina aren’t jumping at the chance to support his socialist policies.

“It makes no sense to me that universal health care, free college, and reining in Wall Street aren’t polices that are resonating with southern voters,” Sanders said in remarks to The New York Times after former secretary of state Hillary Clinton trounced him in the South Carolina primary yesterday. “Hillary stands no chance of beating Donald Trump, Marco Rubio, or Ted Cruz in the South. I just don’t understand what message South Carolina voters sent yesterday by voting for a Democrat who is much more moderate than http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00MRH853S/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00MRH853S&linkCode=as2&tag=daily031-20&linkId=CO5R56GZSV7KSFNPI am.”

Clinton’s win, in which she crushed Sanders with almost three-quarters of the Democratic primary vote, positions her to do well next week in Super Tuesday, which includes many southern states.

Given the unexpected outcome in South Carolina, Sanders says, he will focus his attention on the states he thinks he can win: Texas, Oklahoma, Alabama, and other states that historically have gone for the most liberal candidate. “We’ll let Hillary take some purple states, like Virginia, but for the most liberal, progressive states like Alabama, we’ll focus our attention and get back on track to winning this nomination,” he said. “If we can’t win Alabama, maybe we can’t win anywhere.”

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos (some modified) mv, gs (Creative Commons and public domain). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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