Memo to Carly Fiorina: Actually, No One Wants to See You Debate Hillary

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What do you mean Hillary doesn’t know who I am?

For some reason, Republican presidential nominaton contestant Carly Fiorina thinks everyone in the United States wants to see her debate Hillary Clinton when the presidential race moves into the general election. Apparently, Fiorina thinks because she’s a woman and Clinton is a woman, people want to see the debate. But, actually, no one wants to see them debate and in fact most people don’t even care that Fiorina is running.

“As far as I can tell, the only person who wants to see Hillary and Fiorina debate is Fiorina,” says John Stewart, a Republican political consultant who is not aligned with any candidate.

Stewart says Fiorina, as much as she doesn’t like it, will have to watch Clinton debate someoe else. “It’ll be [Texas Sen.] Ted Cruz or [Florida Sen.] Marco Rubio,” he says. “Maybe [real estate mogul Donald] Trump. But it ain’t going to be her.”

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B015HE4V30/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B015HE4V30&linkCode=as2&tag=daily031-20&linkId=PSYHRLYKWK33MBV7People say they’re baffled by Fiorina’s repeated claim that they want to see her debate Clinton. “I just don’t know why she believes that,” says Sarah Peterson, a marketing associate in Ames, Iowa, who has followed the Republican nomination contest closely. “I personally am not interested in seeing that debate and I don’t know anyone who is.”

Jessica Carnes, a part-time dental hygienist in Cleveland, says she’d like to see a debate between Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin, although Putin probably wouldn’t follow the rules. “They both like to beat up on people, so that would be interesting to see,” she says. “As for this person you mention, Fahrona, Fiorhea, Fiona . . . I don’t know who she is, but l’m curious why she thinks people want to see her debate Hillary Clinton. Did they go to school together, or something?”

Fiorina was fired from Hewlett-Packard in 2005 after she ran its finances into the ground. She says she’s had a few job interviews since then.

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos: gs (Creative Commons). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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