Slipping in Polls, Rand Paul Advised to Stop Playing Rush

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Slipping

Poll numbers have been slipping for U.S. Republican presidential aspirant Sen. Rand Paul (Ky.) since he announced he candidacy in April and one of his top advisors is pointing the finger at Rush, the Canadian progressive rock trio whose libertarian-themed lyrics have made them a long-time favorite of Paul’s.

“As an individual, Rand Paul can listen to any music he wants,” says Chip Englander, the candidate’s campaign manager and one of his top strategists. “It’s not for me to weigh in on someone’s taste in music, no matter how horrible. But as a candidate trying to build a base of support, Rand Paul is doing himself no favors playing music that causes his base of support to run away, screaming ‘Make it stop!’ We’re telling him he can’t go on listening to this music.”

The day after he announced his presidential bid, on April 7, Paul’s poll numbers shot up to 14 percent of likely Republican voters, putting him in a virtual tie for the lead with former Florida governor Jeb Bush. Since then, his numbers have dwindled, and most recent polls put him hovering at about 2 percent, far below other candidates, including real estate mogul Donald Trump, Texas senator Ted Cruz, and Florida senator Marco Rubio. Ohio Gov. John Kasich is also reportedly a Rush fan, and his poll numbers are in the tank, too, although they’re bette than Paul’s and no one expects Kasich to play Rush if he wins the White House.

Message for today?

Red Room rockers?

Englander says a lot of people might be willing to put up with Rush’s music during the campaign but the idea that songs like early-1980s hits “Tom Sawyer,” “The Spirit of Radio,” and “Limelight” could be rocking the White House at night is too much for many people to absorb.

“If you think the White House has a problem with drones landing behind the Oval Office and postmen flying rickety contraptions into the vegetable garden are a problem now, wait until people hear Geddy Lee’s voice screeching out of the Red Room on a Friday night,” says Englander. “One can hardly imagine the effect that will have on thousands of unstable people in this country.”

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The other Rand

For much of Paul’s political career, Rush has been his music of choice. Paul often comes out on stage to the band’s 1981 hit “Tom Sawyer” and he likes to use the band’s songs, with their libertarian-themed lyrics, as discussion points in his speeches. One of his favorite songs for this purpose is a 1977 piece called “The Trees,” which talks about the government cutting down oak trees so they’ll be the same size as nearby maple trees rather than let the oaks take all the sunlight. Paul has pointed to the song as an illustration of what happens when liberal government tries to create equality of outcome rather than let individuals become the best they can be.

Other songs, like the band’s 1976 breakout hit, “2112,” sermonize on libertarian ideas, including the ideas of Objectivist philosophy founder Ayn Rand.

The band’s management, Anthem Entertainment, has asked Paul to stop playing Rush’s music at his events but the candidate continues to play it.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00QR7ZNFW/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00QR7ZNFW&linkCode=as2&tag=mediab-20&linkId=4M7LW7ZHXQEQMRKY

Awesome, dude!

Dave Groton, a budding technology entrepreneur who works part-time at a car rental booth in Des Moines, Iowa, would seem to be the ideal Paul supporter. He says he wants as little government as possible, both in economic and social spheres, but he hates Rush’s music more than he hates liberals. He puts Geddy Lee’s voice on the same category as water boarding and he says the drumming of Neil Peart, who also writes most of the band’s lyrics, is “good only if the sound of tin cans and garbage can lids falling on asphalt at six o’clock in the morning is something you like.”

Becky Reynolds, a dental hygienist in Scottsdale, Ariz., says she likes where Paul is trying to take the Republican party, with his message of economic conservatism and social inclusiveness, and she thinks Rush’s guitar player, Alex Lifeson, “used to be kinda cute,” but no one she knows really likes the band’s music and, in any case, Paul should start playing music that’s more contemporary. “There are a lot of good bands today,” she says. “How cool would it be if he opened with The War on Drugs or Alt-J? Maybe Rush is cool if you’re, like, 60 years old, but most of those people are dead, aren’t they?”

It also doesn’t help that they’re Canadian. “There are no good American rock bands he can choose?” says Peter Glenn, a construction supervisor in Trenton, N.J. “Last time I checked, the Americans invented rock and roll and Bruce Spingsteen perfected it, so I don’t see why this guy has to play a Canadian band that no one liked 30 years ago and no one listens to today. If you can’t make good music choices, how are you going to make good policy choices for the country? Maybe a few minutes locked in a room with Geddy Lee’s voice will bring ISIS to its knees, but beyond that, I don’t see why Paul would make the country listen to the worse rock music ever made in the history of the world. Does this guy hate America?”

Englander says he’s pulling the plug on Paul’s Spotify account if the candidate’s poll numbers drop another two points.

This is a work of satire. It is fictional news article not meant to be taken seriously. Photos: gs and pd (Creative Commons). Not necessarily an endorsed use of images.

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